http://quoth.nexusvector.net/tag/funny Quoth en-us Sun, 07 Feb 2010 09:19:34 -0800 Sun, 07 Feb 2010 09:19:34 -0800 http://quoth.nexusvector.net/quote/3134 Sun, 07 Feb 2010 09:19:34 -0800 funny hippies humor liberalism This isn't the Democratic party of our fathers and grandfathers. This is the party of Woodstock hippies. I was at Woodstock -- I built the stage. And when everything fell apart, and people were fighting for peanut-butter sandwiches, it was the National Guard who came in and saved the same people who were protesting them. So when Hillary Clinton a few years ago wanted to build a Woodstock memorial, I said it should be a statue of a National Guardsman feeding a crying hippie.
- John Ratzenberger
Speech: Scott Brown rally (2010)

]]> http://quoth.nexusvector.net/quote/2549 Sat, 20 Jan 2007 05:55:29 -0800 drown funny horse water You can lead a horse to water, but it takes a hell of a man to drown the damned thing.
- Unknown
Comic:

]]> http://quoth.nexusvector.net/quote/2417 Fri, 04 Aug 2006 13:31:47 -0700 computer funny humor Your computer has too much computer in it and not enough typewriter.
- Strong Bad
Blog post »

]]> http://quoth.nexusvector.net/quote/2292 Tue, 16 May 2006 05:21:28 -0700 death funny humor life You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you want to live to be a hundred.
- Woody Allen

]]> http://quoth.nexusvector.net/quote/2239 Thu, 06 Apr 2006 20:48:00 -0700 analogy enlightenment funny humor I feel like someone opened up my skull and gave skittles to my brain!
- Kate Mitsch

]]> http://quoth.nexusvector.net/quote/2117 Mon, 27 Feb 2006 12:23:30 -0800 food funny humor motherhood The most remarkable thing about my mother is that for thirty years she served the family nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found.
- Calvin Trillin

]]> http://quoth.nexusvector.net/quote/2057 Sun, 12 Feb 2006 18:50:39 -0800 companionship funny humor love masturbation A good showerhead and my right hand,
the two best lovers that I ever had.
Now if you find you agree with what I just said,
you'd better find a new love and let 'em into your head.
- My Morning Jacket
Song: Into the Woods

]]> http://quoth.nexusvector.net/quote/1922 Thu, 15 Dec 2005 22:46:11 -0800 funny future It's 2005! We should be flying around in jetpacks and snorting non-addictive vitamin-rich cocaine out of our sex robot's nipples.
- Greg Geraldo
TV: Comedy Central’s Last Laugh 2005

]]> http://quoth.nexusvector.net/quote/1652 Sat, 30 Jul 2005 06:00:25 -0700 funny science sun The sun is just a nuclear weapon that hasn't finished killing us yet.
- diesel sweeties: pixelated robot romance web comic
Comic: http://www.dieselsweeties.com/archive.php?s=1263

]]> http://quoth.nexusvector.net/quote/1523 Tue, 31 May 2005 00:07:58 -0700 funny headaches scream I don't think tension headaches are contagious, but I guess it depends on how much I scream at people.
- Julie Zobel

]]> http://quoth.nexusvector.net/quote/1464 Fri, 15 Apr 2005 14:38:24 -0700 funny statistics Statistics are like bikinis. What they reveal is suggestive, but what they conceal is vital.
- Aaron Levenstein

]]> http://quoth.nexusvector.net/quote/1447 Fri, 01 Apr 2005 15:00:29 -0800 funny german language German, it's basically like English. English, you know, spoken by a monster, underwater, into a walkie-talkie.
- Tycho
Comic: Penny-Arcade

]]> http://quoth.nexusvector.net/quote/1105 Thu, 24 Feb 2005 13:52:55 -0800 funny random We are all precancerous.
- George Carlin

]]> http://quoth.nexusvector.net/quote/1073 Tue, 22 Feb 2005 21:45:20 -0800 funny math random What do you get when you convolute with yourself?
- Bernard Brooks - RIT Math Professor
talking about convoluting a function with itself

]]> http://quoth.nexusvector.net/quote/1072 Tue, 22 Feb 2005 21:43:58 -0800 friends funny random Put your arm down - that's how you lose friends.
- Ms. Hantout - Spanish Teacher

]]> http://quoth.nexusvector.net/quote/1071 Tue, 22 Feb 2005 21:42:40 -0800 funny random Put your hand down; the war is over.
- Mr. Tedeschi - High School Latin Teacher

]]> http://quoth.nexusvector.net/quote/1066 Mon, 21 Feb 2005 15:14:08 -0800 funny Aw, dammit. I broke my rape cup.
- R.B. Boyer

]]> http://quoth.nexusvector.net/quote/961 Wed, 16 Feb 2005 23:30:41 -0800 funny twins If I ever have twins, I'd use one for parts.
- Steven Wright

]]> http://quoth.nexusvector.net/quote/921 Tue, 15 Feb 2005 12:51:30 -0800 family funny gayrights Whoever you hate -will- end up in your family. If you're homophobic, you gonna have a gay son.

- Chris Rock - Comedian

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